Hi, it's near the end of Sunday. I hope you all are having a good day.
I went out with Tony this afternoon to see a movie, "I Am Legend" with Will Smith and I'll tell ya - it was pretty good.
Anyway, I think I made a mistake. How does one stay friends with someone you've fallen in love with but whom doesn't feel the same for you? I don't know how it's done unless a good amount of time has come and gone. I feel I have added salt upon a wound that hasn't healed yet. Being in each other's company as if the 'love' was never there is so hard. I just don't think I'm strong enough. I have so many emotions and feelings that I feel. I am a very feeling person. I give my whole heart not just a portion of it. Maybe that's where I'm making a mistake too.
Well, I feel I have given all I can give for the last 6-7 months and I really have nothing left. I am entirely empty.
At the end of the evening, as I was getting out of the car, and I hear the words, "stay in touch ok"... were probably the hardest words to hear for me coming from someone I have loved whole-heartedly.
I can't do it anymore. I will need some time to heal my wounds, before I can see him again.
Tony, if you read this, I love you and because I love you, I will need some time apart to heal. Seeing you after only two weeks of discovering that you no longer want to be in a relationship has only made the sting that much deeper. I have to think about myself too. I want to be there for you, and as your friend I will be if you need me, but in the meantime or otherwise, I just can't do it. Unless it is a dire emergency or need... I can't see you for awhile.
I'm falling apart inside and all my feelings have resurfaced tonight. I'm barely trying to keep from drowning, keeping my head above water while treading. And I have no strength left. My heart is broken and I am truly hurt. Part of me just wants to give up and let myself drown, while the other small percent of me wants to survive and live.
If anyone has any uplifting thoughts or quotes or anything worth sharing, please do. I'm crying for help right now. I need all the strength I can get.
Gurgle gurgle,
Christy
I went out with Tony this afternoon to see a movie, "I Am Legend" with Will Smith and I'll tell ya - it was pretty good.
Anyway, I think I made a mistake. How does one stay friends with someone you've fallen in love with but whom doesn't feel the same for you? I don't know how it's done unless a good amount of time has come and gone. I feel I have added salt upon a wound that hasn't healed yet. Being in each other's company as if the 'love' was never there is so hard. I just don't think I'm strong enough. I have so many emotions and feelings that I feel. I am a very feeling person. I give my whole heart not just a portion of it. Maybe that's where I'm making a mistake too.
Well, I feel I have given all I can give for the last 6-7 months and I really have nothing left. I am entirely empty.
At the end of the evening, as I was getting out of the car, and I hear the words, "stay in touch ok"... were probably the hardest words to hear for me coming from someone I have loved whole-heartedly.
I can't do it anymore. I will need some time to heal my wounds, before I can see him again.
Tony, if you read this, I love you and because I love you, I will need some time apart to heal. Seeing you after only two weeks of discovering that you no longer want to be in a relationship has only made the sting that much deeper. I have to think about myself too. I want to be there for you, and as your friend I will be if you need me, but in the meantime or otherwise, I just can't do it. Unless it is a dire emergency or need... I can't see you for awhile.
I'm falling apart inside and all my feelings have resurfaced tonight. I'm barely trying to keep from drowning, keeping my head above water while treading. And I have no strength left. My heart is broken and I am truly hurt. Part of me just wants to give up and let myself drown, while the other small percent of me wants to survive and live.
If anyone has any uplifting thoughts or quotes or anything worth sharing, please do. I'm crying for help right now. I need all the strength I can get.
Gurgle gurgle,
Christy
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